Philanthropy loves to talk about listening. We conduct community surveys and invite nonprofit leaders to speak on our panels. But a truth I had to confront while writing CONTROL: Why Big Giving Falls Short is that listening without first dismantling a mindset of control can translate into surveillance rather than true collaboration.
For too long, the American philanthropic system, Big Giving, has helped facilitate a steady accumulation of public wealth. Today, nearly $2 trillion in publicly earmarked assets — for which donors have already taken a tax exemption — sit idle in philanthropic accounts. Our sector largely treats this money like private wealth, when it should be understood and stewarded as a public good. It is, after all, subsidized by taxpayers, so why do we allow it to be controlled almost exclusively by the wealthy? Big Giving has convinced itself that donor intent and perpetuity are sacred, but what if the most basic obligation we have is to the communities that have every right to expect these dollars now?
Ceding control isn’t failure, but one of the highest forms of accountability.
In the evolution of my own philanthropic practice as CEO of the Stupski Foundation, I found it vital to honestly grapple with why our sector retreats from genuine engagement when the opportunity arises. This dynamic has played out many times over the past decade. We saw it most recently after the last federal election as political winds shifted and many foundations that had vocally uplifted racial justice initiatives stepped back. We heard leaders cite risk, preservation, and the need to protect their assets. But what these moves revealed is the mindset of control in action. Beneath the fear is a grasping belief that the money is still the donor’s money, not the public’s. That controlling belief is a serious barrier to community listening, let alone community engagement.
Shifting a mindset of control
Comprehensive community-engaged giving is not a set of tactics, but a mindset shift. It requires recognizing that if donors take a tax benefit, they are no longer a private benefactor but should think of their work as a public steward.
Public stewards do not stockpile wealth when communities are in crisis. They do not demand reports simply to feel informed. And they certainly do not hide behind century-old bylaws written by long-deceased donors who prioritized perpetuity over people in need.
So how do we upend the mindset of control and build a practice of community-engaged giving? Let me offer three paths.
First, it takes recognizing that foundation dollars are public dollars. That means that anyone on a board, a CEO, or anyone working for a foundation really needs to question why they continue to do things for the private needs of the foundation. For example, I had a foundation leader tell me recently that they are unable to move more money into community hands at this time because it would threaten perpetuity, which would infringe on the bylaws and the donor’s intent for the foundation. In this response, I heard loud and clear the echo of donor control and a deep fear of granting “too much money” that could, in turn, harm their institution. When this is the logic, our institutions become more of a tax shelter than a vehicle for good. As for the donor, who’s now deceased, they expressed that they wanted “their foundation” to live forever, and that wish was built into the bylaws.
The truth about bylaws is that they can, in fact, be changed. We’ve done this several times at Stupski Foundation. I believe that foundation staff and board leadership who truly want to lean into public stewardship can and should find ways to change bylaws like this, especially as communities are facing such a monumental crisis. Listening to community means really responding, challenging our own mindset of control, and acting on it. So if the bylaws say you cannot listen to community, that needs to be acknowledged as a control issue and addressed.
Number two, communities are asking for greater flexibility in the money they receive. And even at Stupski Foundation, I’ve found we still have control issues expressed in grant agreements, and we have to work through that. For example, we have language in some of our agreements that requires grantees to make themselves available to convenings, to meet with us, and to report on how things are going. At Stupski Foundation, we have worked really hard at loosening our grip on control, and the mindset of control is an insidious thing; it still shows up. Recognizing this is a reminder to stay engaged in rooting out a mindset of control over time. It requires going through all your practices and questioning why you need them. Why do you need reporting? Why do you need grantee touchpoints? Who benefits? Have you asked the community whether these practices are truly to the benefit of their work? In answering these questions, it’s on the donor to be very clear that if they are going to engage in these practices, they’re doing it for the benefit of the grantee and not for the benefit of the donor.
Third, celebrate a good exit. I believe we should celebrate donors who learn to let go and listen. And we should equally celebrate donors who recognize they cannot let go. If you take an honest self-assessment and realize that you cannot embrace public stewardship, then take your tax benefit and step away. Bring in community leaders who have the relationships, the trust, and the willingness to cede control. Ceding control isn’t failure, but one of the highest forms of accountability.
Listening to community is an act of trust, service, and surrender. It means working to change your bylaws to serve community needs, releasing the need for endless reporting requirements, and recognizing that, ultimately, the capital you steward is not yours to control. It belongs to the people and should be stewarded with their guidance and in their best interest (not the donor’s).
Letting go. Giving up control. Trusting community. All of these things take courage, vision, and a willingness to finally hear what communities have been saying for a long time: Move the money now.
Glen Galaich
Chief Executive Officer, Stupski Foundation
Listen to Community Ambassador
